Breaking News: LeBron James To Leave NBA

"Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire" (arch-duke-maxyenko) 06/25/2014 at 15:09 • Filed to: None

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As per 2:45 pm Wednesday the 25th, LeBron James will no longer play professional basketball.

Instead of playing basketball, LeBron will set his sights on the next level of professional sports. "I will be leaving my basketball career behind for auto racing," LeBron said. "Specifically, I will begin racing at Le Mans with Ferrari next year." He further added, "After losing the NBA final, I began talking with Luca di Montezemolo, who after under-performing in yet another season of F1, decided it was time to go back to Le Mans."

We reached out to Luca for further information and he only said this, "Look, Ferrari, LeBron, and Le Mans all go together. Next year, we can promise that we will NOT disappoint again."

-ESPN

Audi-os, Amigos! > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 06/25/2014 at 15:13

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LAferrari, LE mans, LEbron?

Checks out.

Jacques L' Autre > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 06/25/2014 at 15:14

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You had me until, "loosing."

ttyymmnn > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 06/25/2014 at 15:14

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Whatever will he do for money?

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > Jacques L' Autre 06/25/2014 at 15:19

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I don't know what you're talking about.

EL_ULY > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 06/25/2014 at 15:21

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Galileo Humpkins (aka MC Clap Yo Handz) > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 06/25/2014 at 15:21

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i knew i should not have clicked on the "espn" source link but i just had to see what form of nonsense it would be...i regret it...

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > EL_ULY 06/25/2014 at 15:21

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One of the many jokes in this.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > Galileo Humpkins (aka MC Clap Yo Handz) 06/25/2014 at 15:22

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You mean it didn't take you to the article on ESPN?

Fucking kinja.

Galileo Humpkins (aka MC Clap Yo Handz) > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 06/25/2014 at 15:26

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no, but don't worry, i got you covered:

ESPN

dinobot666 > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 06/25/2014 at 15:28

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Now I know who this person is. Thanks.

dinobot666 > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 06/25/2014 at 15:30

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Update: This is some kind of hoax or something.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > ttyymmnn 06/25/2014 at 15:41

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Sell merch.

SubiSanchez > EL_ULY 06/25/2014 at 16:03

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So next time the sports announcer says "LeBron is on fire!" it will have a more literal meaning I'm guessing.